My life has been confusing from the very beginning. When I was five years old, I was separated from my brother and sister. They were placed in a foster home together, but because they are bi-racial and I am not, I was sent to a different home. I missed my mom, my brother, and my sister terribly. That foster home ended up being abusive. I testified that I had been beaten simply for wringing out a washcloth the wrong way, and the family was eventually charged with child abuse.
Around that same time, my mother passed away from diabetic shock on July 18, 1992—my sister’s birthday. I was only five years old.
After that, I was moved around for a while. I spent time in foster care on a farm in New York and later lived with my aunt until my grandmother was finally able to gain guardianship when I was seven. My grandmother did the best she could raising me, and it was during those years that I was introduced to church and to God. I also discovered that on my father’s side of the family, I had more than twenty cousins.
“Looking ahead, I feel called toward mission work. I want to continue learning what that means and how God wants to use my story.”
But life was still difficult. I saw my father only a handful of times, and when I did, those interactions were often painful. I carried deep wounds from losing my mom, being abused in foster care, and feeling rejected for much of my childhood. I struggled with believing I was loved.
By the time I was thirteen, I had already started smoking, drinking, and rebelling. Eventually, I was placed in a corrective home for young boys. The pain and anger inside me kept growing, and I began turning to substances to cope.
What started with cigarettes, alcohol, and marijuana eventually turned into crack cocaine. By the time I was eighteen, I was drinking every day. For the next 20–25 years, addiction controlled my life. There were moments where I tried to stop—going to rehab here and there—but I always went back. Over time, I pushed away everyone who loved me because I wanted no one to have authority over my life. I isolated myself so I could continue using.
Addiction destroyed relationship after relationship. Women in my life often tried to help or “fix” me, but I pushed them away with anger and self-destructive behavior. I had a terrible temper and struggled to keep steady jobs.
When I was 22, I had a child with a wonderful woman. I truly believed that becoming a father would help me stop drinking. Instead, my addiction tightened its grip. Our relationship became unhealthy, and domestic violence followed. I ended up on probation and separated from my child. Those were some of the loneliest years of my life.
There were short seasons when I tried to get sober, but I kept falling back into drugs and alcohol. By my early thirties, I was deeply depressed and barely hanging on. For years, I bounced in and out of rehabs, and each relapse seemed worse than the last.
Everything began to change when I moved to Wisconsin from Binghamton, New York, on December 22, 2024. At that point, I was in one of the darkest places of my life. I had no job and was scraping metal just to survive, staying in places I never imagined I would. I felt completely stuck.
Then a close friend reached out and helped bring me to Wisconsin. Within days, I had a job interview in Green Bay, and soon I was working three jobs for the same business owner. But within two months, I relapsed again. It only took two weeks for everything to fall apart.
That business owner showed me incredible kindness. After finding me in a blackout, he paid for a hotel room for me. The next day, he drove me to Adult & Teen Challenge Northeastern Wisconsin.
Walking through those doors changed everything.
I arrived on March 6. Just a few days later, during chapel, God got my attention in a way I couldn’t ignore. A song I hadn’t heard in years had been stuck in my head all morning and during chapel, it played as the third song of the service. In that moment, I knew God was real and speaking to me.
That same day, during “Get Real Tuesday,” I stood up in front of everyone and poured my heart out to God. For the first time in my life, I fully surrendered.
From that point on, my life began changing right before my eyes.
On April 8, I was born again.
On April 10, I was baptized in the Holy Spirit. And on April 11, I was baptized in the waters of Green Bay.
Today, I know I am held in the loving arms of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
Since entering the program, my thinking has completely changed. I no longer want to isolate myself or escape life. Instead, I want to be around people, especially in
the church. I’m no longer ashamed to be in public or in conversation. Instead of looking for ways to end conversations, I look for ways to show love, encourage others, and share hope.
Now I spend my time praying, studying God’s Word, ministering to others, and praying for people. My heart has shifted from serving myself to serving others.
Looking ahead, I feel called toward mission work. I want to continue learning what that means and how God wants to use my story. I know firsthand the power of His transformation. I’ve experienced His mercy, His healing, and His love.
And I want to spend the rest of my life sharing that hope with others.